Lauren – brilliant story, worthy of a separate blog at AFi!

gl666 – it’s funny you mention the footraces…I have another personal story involving that, maybe for a Part II followup blog…

I have to agree, that I used to have “Action Figure Fridays” because the local walmart would get there trucks on Friday and lately even on Friday no matter what time I go I seem to miss the boat and I can tell everything has been picked thru or what I think sometimes happens is while the truck is there that shipment goes to the warehouse and what was in the warehouse hits the floor because often times I see nothing but old figures. Now my action figure Fridays consist of me surfing the net and just putting in a pre-order these days. Its not as fun, but in the end its cheaper and I actually get the figure I was looking for.

I’m glad you liked my rainbow Green Lantern picture above. They were a pain to get and caused me some serious stress with my girlfriend who went to SDCC with me and is part of why I managed to get my one set. We do go to extreme lengths sometimes to get the toys we love. Would I do it again? Probably not. The multi-colored Hals are nice to have but that’s almost all I did that convention.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/shadowowl/3796792240/

Anyways, fun article.

This is all in good fun. I love my husband and think his collecting is pretty hilarious and sometimes awesome. I just wrote this to tease him.

We’ve all felt it.
It begins when you think you’re *just* going grocery shopping with your husband. He fidgets and rushes through each aisle, and as you compare different organic dog treats, he says “JUST PICK ONE!” like his brain is literally on fire. After grocery shopping with your hubs on speed-mode, you’re pretty tired and psyched to just go home and relax.
But, wait… he just passed our turn? Then, it dawns on you…there’s a Toys-R-Us on this side of town. Sigh.

“Can we skip Toys-R-Us today? We have ice cream in the trunk.” you ask. He looks at you with panic-stricken eyes and almost chokes on the words “PLEASEITWILLJUSTTAKEAMINUTE!” True, but, add this toy run to the 15 other toy runs from this week (on the way home from work, while running errands, secret midnight cross-county excursions…) and you are logging some serious gas money, mileage and time.

Hubby circles the parking lot like an eagle, and descends upon *his* parking spot. He’s a creature of habit, you know he parks in this spot every time. Suggesting he park closer or somewhere else causes him physical pain. You might as well stab him in the leg with a pencil. He puts the car in park and gets out faster than you ever thought possible. You follow your husband into the store, where he practically somersaults to the toy aisle. The stench of obsession wafts backwards at you.

Finally – you reach the toy aisle! But wait -someone is already there! Your husband screeches to a halt. Obviously, more than 1 person cannot look at figures at the same time. Under normal circumstances you would stand next to that person or politely say “excuse me”, but this person shoots you with a hateful glare, like you’re trying to abduct his first-born child.

Your husband skulks to the next aisle, peering around the endcap periodically. The ice cream is likely a goopy puddle by now.
As an indifferent wife, you stand your ground against the outsider, and the fact that you have a vagina overpowers him soon and he darts away.
Like a starving lion descending on a crippled zebra, your husband assaults the shelves. He flips through the rows of boxes, even though after 15 milliseconds of looking, he already knows that the figure he wants isn’t there. You can feel the nuclear disappointment radiating from him like he’s a kid getting punched in the face by Jesus on Christmas morning. You could probably cut off his arms right now and he would barely notice while he visibly writhes with his toy-related heartbreak. You glance at your watch. That ice cream is boiling by now.

He reaches up on top of the shelves, looks below displays and digs through row after row of toys. This is highly dissimilar to his half-hearted search for the TV remote, when he looks under one couch cushion, declares “THE REMOTE IS MISSING”, and then sits and watches QVC for 3 hours. Now, suddenly, he is an expert hunter, able to pin-point dented packaging from 3 miles away.

You wander over to the girls toys to let your husband grieve. You see some kind of action figure buried with the barbies and you extract it. “Hey, I found an x-figure. Is that what you were looking for?” He appears beside you instantaneously, a far cry from when he somehow eludes you in your 900 square foot apartment on laundry day.
“Oh,” he sighs. “It’s just an x1-figure.” He slinks away.

You follow him, preparing yourself for when his adrenaline bottoms out and he’s like a gambler who’s lost everything to South American drug-lords.

Finally, back to the car. You both get in. You know he can’t wait to get home to go on the Fwoosh to post about his defeat. You close your eyes, dreaming of the soft couch that awaits you. 15 minutes later, the car comes to a stop. You open your eyes. Damnit. We’re at Target.

Hunting can be fun, but I almost have more fun hunting for friends. When I strike out I’m not annoyed, but I still feel the victory when I score.

I would say that it’s not about the chase for me, but yet I find myself chasing from time to time. Between reports of some TRUs putting out GL product early, and the second series of Jakk’s POTC line due to hit any time now…I’ve found myself in TRU and Walmart more often recently than I’d care to admit. And completely non-aerodynamic Honda Element gets crappy gas mileage and gas is like $4.89/gal right now. It’s ridiculous, and I get frustrated for doing it. And, yet…

Id almost say we were brothers -except for that fascination for an Orange Scaley Clad man–or the Red and Yellow armor-(which oddly enough mix to make orange)– If your favorite Lantern is Larfleeze– I think you may have a problem.

this is the best line out of the entire article.

I consider myself more of a “hunter” than a “collector”. many times I rush to finish an entire set or toyline, only upon completion do I look back and stare at the toys and think “What now?”

It usually ends with me selling them as a set, to break even, and begin looking for something else.

Great article. and fun. Thanks.

Cory