Don't Mess with the Yellow Track Suit
October 29, 2011

It takes some guts for a dude to walk out of his home wearing yellow sneakers. Trust me, I’ve done it. Its one of those situations where the image in your head is a lot cooler than the actual execution. Perhaps it would have translated better if I had accessorized with either yellow nunchucks, an Nth metal mace, or a Hattori Hanzo sword. Or perhaps I should have just realized that it is a very special club that gets to don … the yellow track suit.

Apparently you have to have achieved a certain level of bad-assery to rock a yellow track suit and kicks. First Bruce Lee wears one and ends up kicking a 7’2″ Kareem Abdul-Jabbar in the face. Then Beatrix Kiddo pays homage to Bruce and takes out about 50 88’s. Finally, Shayera Hol riffs on the theme and successfully navigates a love triangle.

I want nothing more than a well sculpted, nicely articulated 6″ Game of Death Bruce Lee. Just can’t pony up the moolah necessary for the amazing Enterbay one. And, whereas, I do like the NECA Kill Bill Beatrix Kiddo, I’d love a less statuesque version of the character I’ll name my first daughter after.

Yes, I own these Asics Onitsuka Tiger Mexico 66’s. Wore them once and realized I wasn’t worthy. I’ve been practicing my round house, though.

Danny "CantinaDan" Neumann
Action figure anthropologist, Professor Cantina Dan Neumann has been a scholastic contributor to the online community studying the complex world of parumplasticus populus {little plastic people} since the turn of this millenium. His primary focus is the visual cataloging of species exhibits through photo-journalism.
Read other articles by Danny "CantinaDan" Neumann.





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